Sunday, January 9, 2011

I Have Been Jossed

I think it was in 2005 and 2006 I wrote the serial fan fiction novel The Chronicles of Fone Bone Oathbreaker, based on Jeff Smith's Bone comics.  The fan fiction was on the internet in complete form for only a few months before I took it down, but after some editing I posted it again in 2008.

When I first posted Oathbreaker, I received praise from fans, but the second posting has received derision for a number of reasons, important among them being the recent publication of a prequel entitled Tall Tales, which depicts a baby bone being born, thereby invalidating my crazy speculations about bone babies being delivered by a stork, which made sense to me, since that's where I have always understood baby cartoon characters to come from.  In Looney Tunes, for example, the stork is a drunkard who gets high and tight on the champagne with which new parents toast him whenever he arrives with a baby, but then he has to run for his life from Daffy Duck, who comes after him with a shotgun because Daffy doesn't want any more children.  If I had seen that as an adult rather than as a child, I would have found it really disturbing.

When the canon negates something that has already been written in a fan work, it is known as "jossing." Oathbreaker has been officially jossed.  This gives me a certain sense of closure.

This means, of course, that The Chronicles of Fone Bone Oathbreaker is not merely outside canon, which it was already, but so outside canon that if you stood on the highest peak in the canon and searched with the world's most powerful binoculars, you still wouldn't see Oathbreaker.  Fanboys and fangirls are therefore justified in heaping scorn upon me, cussing me out, and questioning the diversity of my genealogical heritage.  Such is their right, of course, but I ask them to remember in their wrath that human dignity demands that the number of lashes delivered with a wet noodle be limited to forty minus one.

I recently stumbled upon a thread in an internet forum in which fans expressed their horror, sadness, anger, and frustration over The Chronicles of Fone Bone Oathbreaker.  Actually having my work talked about in an internet forum, even my work that rips off someone else's work, makes me very happy.  I invite you all to join in here.
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