I've been away for quite a while, but as usual I have an excuse. Although my past business ventures, such as the Tossed Cookies Plug-ins and Shiatsu by Shih Tzu were failures, my current one is sure to be a huge success.
You can tell this is a gluttonous society: we now actually bathe in food. The other day, I was in the soap aisle at the grocery store looking at the body wash and began to notice the various ingredients: mango, green tea, yogurt, honey, and even oatmeal. I said to myself, "This isn't soap, this is breakfast." Yet the foods offered here in the soap aisle are all woman-on-a-diet breakfasts. Where are the manly, meaty soaps to get my day started?
That's why I've created Hearty Breakfast Soap for Men™, made with moisturizing sausage and eggs, exfoliating hash browns, and coffee (a skin toner and emulsifier). Hearty Breakfast Soap for Men™ rinses clean with no filmy residue, making your skin feel refreshed, leaving behind nothing but a light scent of bacon.
Hearty Breakfast Soap for Men™ is also available with grits for extra exfoliating action. And try our new hand soap, The Lumberjack™, designed to remove even the toughest grime.
Hearty Breakfast Soap for Men™ comes with my personal money-back guarantee: If you're not so satisfied that you think you could skip your next shower, I'll give you your money back. And as my added gift to you, each bottle comes with a free hotcake-shaped body pouf.
They say the morning shower is the most important shower of the day, so start your day off right--with Hearty Breakfast Soap for Men™.