Saturday, August 9, 2008

The Six Quirks Meme

Snuffles the Dragon here. I got tagged with a meme sometime back and decided I didn't want to do it, so I took advantage of our subscription to Grundir the Implacable's Meme-Dispatching Service. Here's the meme's obnoxious rules:

1. Links the person who tagged you.
2. List the rules on your blog.
3. Tell six unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag six fellow bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged bloggers' blogs letting them know they've been tagged.

Considering that the number six is so important, why does the meme have only five irritating rules? Couldn't they have added a sixth, like maybe, "Hit yourself in the groin with a can of pork 'n' beans while answering this meme"? That's about what trying to answer this kind of meme feels like, so why not enhance the experience?

Here's from Grundir:

This is indeed a foul-smelling wretch of a meme. I shall honor my commitment to protect your blog from loathsome creatures such as this. Here is my response:

Six Quirks about Grundir the Implacable

1. My hatred for hobbits precedes my death and transformation into a Nazgul. I hate all diminutive humanoids, truth be told. I think it started with my father, who was an exceedingly cruel man. He was not actually short, but he was always very distant, which made him appear much smaller than he was. He used to urinate into wineskins and then toss them at my head from the roof of a neighboring cottage.

2. I speak 17 languages, twelve of which I made up in my spare time.

3. I have only three fingers on my right hand. Wait, five. Trick of the light.

4. Peter Jackson smells like cheese. I guess that one's not really about me, but it's true.

5. I never really understood why Sauron wanted control over Middle Earth. I mean, Left Earth and Right Earth are where all the action is. Middle Earth is just fly-over country.

6. "Grundir" is actually old Norse for "Katie Couric." My parents were big fans.

So there you go.
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