Thursday, August 2, 2007

Kissing Science Fiction Style

Some time back, Claw of the Conciliator put up a post alerting us to two other blog posts discussing various philosophers' and various theologians' views on kissing. It suddenly struck me to ask, what have various science fiction writers said about kissing? In honor of these other posts on the subject of kissing, I now offer a brief list. Feel free to suggest additions.

The Isaac Asimov Kiss: A thousand-year period of darkness is coming, during which kissing will be impossible.

The Arthur C. Clarke Kiss: You can kiss in hard vacuum if you're quick about it.

The Robert A. Heinlein Kiss: If you grok Martian, you can kiss anyone you want...and you should spend four years in the military.

The Hal Clement Kiss: An essay on the physics of kissing will follow the story.

The C. S. Lewis Kiss: "I cannot bear the least suggestion, no matter how sportive, of kissing between different species or even between children."

The J. R. R. Tolkien Kiss: As there is no room in the novel, the kissing has been relegated to an appendix.

The H. P. Lovecraft Kiss: "I have seen all that the universe has to hold of horror, and now even the kisses of pretty girls will ever afterwards be poison to me."

The Charles Stross Kiss: I'm so sick of your %^&*# backwards social conventions! Just %^&*# kiss her!

The F. Paul Wilson Kiss: A gratuitous and graphic kissing scene will be inserted into the middle of the novel to maintain the reader's interest.

The Christopher Paolini Kiss: More-or-less a combination of the Anne McCaffrey Kiss, the J. R. R. Tolkien Kiss, and the George Lucas Kiss.

The Jeff Smith Kiss: Hand-holding, hugging, and group nude bathing are acceptable, but no kissing!
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