Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Unicorns Not Good Designated Drivers

According to this AP News article from SFGate.com, a man in Billings, Montana, crashed into a light pole and told police that he wasn't driving, a unicorn was.

Once again we see the perils of reading too little speculative fiction. Had this man been fantasy-literate, he would have known not to let his unicorn drive in the first place. Unicorns make lousy designated drivers. I never let my unicorn Frederick drive. As for my gryphon Jerry, he can't drive because he always wants to ride in the bed or stick his head out the window. My dragon Snuffles, on the other hand, is a reasonably good driver, though I had to instruct him not to give other drivers "the claw" when he gets cut off on the Interstate.

Anyway, police officers have about the same reaction to the "My unicorn crashed my car" excuse that teachers have to the "My dog ate my homework" excuse (with me, it was always "My manticore ate my homework," and that went over even worse).

So here's the AP article for you:

Billings, Mont. (AP) --

A man told police not to blame him for crashing his truck into a light
post — it was that unicorn behind the wheel. Prosecutor Ingrid Rosenquist said
Phillip C. Holliday Jr. initially denied driving the truck involved in the March
7 crash in Billings. [more...]
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